POSTPARTUM CHECKUP 🌑

SAME SAME,
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You think it’d be easier this second time around considering I’ve had experience. Unfortunately, it ain’t the same. Emotions & anxiety were at times beyond control & off the roof. This time it came in a little later for me; towards the 1 month mark.

POST BABY BODY
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Leaking boobs, stretch marks that may be forever noticeable, loose skin & not being able to work out as often as desired now that I am more occupied being a mum of 2. Yep, my inner judgmental voice was loud & those were my thoughts a few months ago.

Stretch marks were not a thing for me with my first pregnancy which was why I was a little unprepared for the reality of how I’d look with such dark marks on my body after giving birth to my second. I felt this relentless pressure on myself to go back to my pre-baby body without the marks. I didn’t expect it to affect me as much as it did, but the visibility was hard to ignore. It certainly didn’t help lift my mood with my MIL consistently asking “why is your stomach still so big” either.

I can’t say that my stretch marks & loose skin are a thing of the past, but the marks have certainly faded quite a bit whereas my loose skin is now more firm. Will discuss more on this topic including effective products + progress photos in the next post.

EMOTIONSromantic-font

How are you? I think this question needs to be asked more often because life after giving birth is challenging AF, especially when you also have a toddler. I really appreciate everyone who checked in on my mental health from time to time. It reminded me to make sure I was ok because for a short while there.. I was not.

Some days I find myself strong AF where I’m able to respond positively about any negativity thrown my way. Then there are days where it hits me like a ton of bricks. I even considered getting medication at one point because I felt completely out of it, I didn’t know who I was anymore. Turns out I just needed space from my in-laws. You’re thinking.. “how bad can they be..”. Shall I give you a little glimpse?

MENTAL HEALTHromantic-font

My in laws were at our place every day for the first week+ then every second day the week after & every third day leading to Luna’s 1month. Though, I highly appreciate my in-laws being more involved this time around as they were not present with Nova, but I felt like it was better when they weren’t so involved. Every visit consisted of fridge checks to see whether or not I’d been “obeying” followed by interrogation after interrogation. It’d be nice if Nova weren’t so terrified of them too; they over smother her so she cries for her life every time which stresses the fork out of me having to witness or hear it. Not to mention my MIL hosting a dinner gathering at our place without telling us in advance. To top it off, organising a 1month ceremony for Luna with 9 other people at our home without our consent was like pushing me off the edge with duck tape over my mouth.

Like HEL-LO! Did someone forget the fact that I had just given birth, am recovering & need some privacy to rest because I have a newborn & toddler to care for as well?? I was completely overwhelmed & swamped with panic & anxiety attacks. I even cried to my parents who had to white lie to my in-laws just so that we could have some space (after Daniel’s words were ignored as per usual). Like c’mon, I’ve just had my 2nd child. I deserve to be treated like an adult don’t I? When I told my mum she said “in Vietnam, your MIL would probably hit you if you didn’t listen to her”. Well, ain’t I luck I’m in Australia then. WTF. This does not make it ok. Unlike your own parents, it’s not easy to say “no” to in-laws & my MIL is the “my way or the highway” kind of person. Fortunately, I’m in a better place today but it still hit me at times when being placed in similar situations, situations I can’t avoid. Got to give credit to anyone who has suffered from this & has gotten themselves through & out of this. To fall down these kind of holes & having to climb back up again on your own is not easy. That’s why I have such a “fork off” attitude today now that I am a mum LOl I ain’t gonna tolerate shhh from anyone anymore.

HAIR LOSS

Shed like a dog, no joke. Luckily, this time I was mentally prepared for it. It happened around 3 months, same time as previous. Though, this time not as much vs my first pp.

FIRST PERIOD

Back to the reality of life with pads & periods. I did not miss this part. My first period was at 6 month pp which is 3months earlier than my previous pp period. I didn’t get my period the entire time I breastfed Nova which was almost 9 months so I wasn’t expecting it this early since I’m still breastfeeding Luna. Unlike the previous, this time it came in like a waterfall. Never flow so heavy before. Cramps, cramps cramps! All it did was hurt me more.

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